Veterans Wives Group

Kath's story

Hi, my name is Kath Tonkin, it is 2003 and I am 56. My husband of 35 years is Tom. He decided aged 32 in 1978, to join the RAAF as an adult trainee Air Frame Fitter. After much training and study, he was posted to 3AD Amberley and spent 15 months in the Deseal/Reseal F111 fuel tanks.

We have two children, Adam then 8 and Jen then 6.

Tom used to come home from work and fall asleep. He was forgetful, unreliable. He had a terrible, repugnant odour that wouldn't wash off. He tripped out for short periods. Was often in a bad mood or rage because he had a headache. His night vision was poor.

The kids and I learned to step on eggshells. We tried to avoid him rather than get into an argument. Seemed like he was drunk even if he only had a few beers. He had night sweats. Dropped things.

All seemingly small things that sneaked up on us all, without us noticing. Christmas of 1980 some friends came to stay and after a few days commented to me that they were concerned about Tom, that he was repeating himself and his old quick wit was gone. It was like a light bulb going on. It had to be Tom's work environment! Tom finished in Deseal but we now know the damage was already done.

But he was one of the 'lucky' ones. HIS wife and children knew that after exposure he became a different person, so it was 'the chemicals' or 'the airforce' that we blamed. We love him.

Many deseal couples we have met are estranged from their children, who think their dad is a dickhead. Indeed many marriages have ended for the same reason.

Tom put in a claim with Veterans Affairs for memory loss and rashes. He reported to Medical who did lots of tests. We were told that the tests found nothing. The Medical officer said some chemicals have an anaesthetic affect on the brain. A specialist told Tom his symptoms would dissipate. So we calmed down, and closed the DVA claim.

Tom tried to avoid all things with a fast evaporative content. Like nail polish, polish remover, many household cleaners, petrol, paint, glue, even Texta pens. So many things we use every day. It has curtailed his hobbies and projects (and I hate painting).

Actually, the smell of most of those things now makes me nauseous, my warning system I guess.

After being out of Deseal for over a year, we realized the chemicals were still having adverse effects, even in the hangar. I wanted Tom to leave the RAAF, but he was obligated to serve 6 years.

He went to the base Padre who asked us to draw up a list of complaints for an application for an early discharge on compassionate grounds. The application was unsuccessful but it has come back to haunt us many times. We were accused of being unhappy and disgruntled with Air Force life, and making up excuses to gain an early discharge!

Even so, Tom applied for a Medical Discharge. That was rejected, but the Board agreed that a clerical remuster would be beneficial to Tom and the Service. All fine and good, but did anyone ask Tom if he would like to be a desk jockey? No. One mustering offered meant he had to learn Indonesian. They really must have thought his 'Memory loss' was just a ploy!

We have on record that some smarty said that LAC Tonkin would make a good airman - if his wife became a good service wife. And still I am fighting for my man!

He was eventually allowed to leave, less than a year early - "Service not in the interest of the Air Force." Tom had been asked to sign on for a further period and refused because he would leave after his 6 years.

We came to Mackay and thought we had put the terrible RAAF experiences behind. Not so! Tom tried many jobs and had to leave each of them because he was exposed to chemicals. A new claim was submitted to Veterans Affairs.

Eventually Tom got a job outdoors as a labourer with our local council, and life settled. He had to make a living and tried to avoid chemicals, and got high when he couldn't.

Problems after exposure to many chemical are unreliable memory, feeling of vagueness, euphoria (off with the pixies), tripping out for short periods, rash sometimes, suspicion, lack of trust, fear of confined spaces, headaches, bad night vision, drowsiness, breathing difficulties, cough, discomfort in crowds, getting the fumbles, feeling of inadequacy with work, study, music, public speaking, high cholesterol, dropping off to sleep watching TV and then only sleeping a few hours in bed, sexual inadequacy, suspicion, fear of forgetting, unacceptable behaviour, lethargy, apathy, alcohol - fast effect sometimes others not, mood swings usually after alcohol or if mentally challenged.

In 1984 a claim for solvent-caused damage was refused. In 1987 it was determined that Tom suffered 'a temporary reaction to solvents'. 1990 another determination to remove the word 'temporary'.

But, it went on to say:

'You were not discharged as Medically unfit and suitable employment as a signals operator was available to you at the same rate of pay. You have therefore suffered no loss of earning power as a result of your condition. It is determined that compensation is not payable in respect of incapacity for work.'

So once more we just had to get on with life. I had a job and that helped when combined with Tom's meagre wages.

Since about 2000 Tom was getting very tired. We put it down to working in the sun.

Late 2000 we heard on ABC radio that there was to be Board of Enquiry into the health of people who worked in the F111 Deseal/Reseal fuel tanks. Wow! Someone more powerful than us has been heard!

2001, and a Barrister comes to Mackay to get Tom's statement for the Board of Enquiry. A few months later a Solicitor comes to our home and gets more info for the Enquiry.

Tom was not asked to appear. I used to go to the library to check for articles about the Enquiry. Before the Enquiry concluded, the DVA put notices in all major newspapers asking for people who had been involved in the F111 Deseal/Reseal fuel tanks to participate in a Health Study.

In September the findings of the Board of Enquiry were made public. The Chief of the Air Force announced the appointment of an F111 Advocate, the interim Health Scheme for desealers with reasonably attributed conditions, and the DVA Health Study.

In October we heard that Military Compensation will backdate Toms claim to 1990 because of the Board's findings (Military Compensation instead of DVA because of the date of 'injury').

This means that they will back pay to 1990 (do not know why 1981) a figure of $69,000 but $38,000 after tax. And they will subsidise wages until Tom turns 65.

2002 - Tom is exhausted. We apply to MCRS for Tom to leave work. But they will not pay him unless a Doctor will declare him unfit to work. Impossible.

In 2002 Tom begins seeing DVA and MCRS doctors. One mentioned a high platelet count to keep an eye on. It gets progressively higher so Tom begins tests to work out the cause. He finds out he has colon polyps, moderate sleep apnoea, benign chest lumps, benign cysts on liver, his arm went numb, but nothing indicates a reason for the high platelets.

He had a bone marrow aspiration and trephine which suggest essential thrombocythaemia.

Dysplastic megakaryocytes suggest early Myelodysplasia.

Don't really know what all that means, but Tom visits a Haematologist and commenced chemotherapy in December 2002, and will be on it two weeks on, two off, for the rest of his life.

It made him so sick. We had a terrible Christmas. He has not been back to work since.

His sick leave eventually ran out and MCRS will pay him about what he got at the Council, until he turns 65. I finished work last year as I was so stressed with Toms' problems, and all the paperwork.

We have both been to a Psychologist, me mainly for anger management. I am so angry that we have been fighting for so long, and still we are fighting.

Tom was notified in April that he was granted a 100% disability pension and Gold Card. This is solely on psychiatric reasons. Veterans Affairs say Tom is not eligible for TPI as he did not leave work for attributable conditions - the last Medical Certificate states Major (recurrent) depressive disorder, but they do not believe this?

Military Compensation are paying Tom his wages for chronic chemical hypersensitivity and have also attributed his Blood Condition.

Veterans Affairs have deferred a decision on these conditions 'as further medical evidence, including the results of the F111 Health Study is required'.

I do not understand why they are using these delaying tactics.

Yesterday 29.08.03, Tom received a letter from the Health Study to report on his analysis of last January. There were two surprises which will need to be checked out.

His eye test was abnormal and the Vibration Sensation tests indicate what may be consistent with Neuropathy in both hands.

We don't know much at this stage about Neuropathy but it is very frightening as we know of four desealers who have 'it'. One is in a wheelchair and two are nearly up to that stage.

So that's what our lives are up to at this stage. Our legacy from Deseal.

I have read reports similar to the above and all three are so similar that it's scary. One of these ladies is now a widow, her husband died of a massive heart attack, aged 48. Both did not know of the Deseal Legacy until the Board of Enquiry!

We trusted the Air Force. The job in the F111 fuel tanks had to be done. And it was.

Contrived or not, most men were sent directly from training, so most were still in their teens, and lived on Base. They had no mother or lover to query their mood swings etc.

Our men were the human sacrifice to the great F111, like lambs to the slaughter.

Kath Tonkin, December 2003

Close this window