Looking for advice

Fred Hackett (fhackett@WorldLink.ca)
Fri, 29 Mar 1996 02:22:09 -0800


I've stumbled onto this NewsGroup through heavy surfing and a bit of luck, but I'm glad 
to see that it exists. I'm going to keep this (fairly) brief because I've finally got a 
chance to sleep after 2 days without any sleep.

My son James was born yesterday (March 28th) at 34 weeks exactly, so I suppose I barely 
qualify for this group. Having said that, initial indications are that we're going to 
have to face some of the same issues faced by many of you. He was a good size, 5 lbs. 9 
oz. and received good Apgar results. I noticed right away that his breathing was not 
right and he was making odd sounds that indicated he was not getting the oxygen he 
needed, despite the initial good scores. He was taken to the NICU after a few minutes 
(luckily they let my wife hold him for a couple of minutes, something for which we are 
extremely grateful for now) and hooked him up to several machines.

After a couple of hours, the resident told us he would have to be hooked up to a 
respirator because his lungs were not fully developed and giving him oxygen was not 
working. He would also be given Surfactant and monitored carefully for blood-oxygen 
utilization. It seems that he should have been given an injection of a steroid before 
birth, but that wasn't done due to his "advanced" age for a preemie.

It's pretty hard to describe the feeling one gets looking down at your baby with tubes 
and wires coming out of every part of his body, watching his laboured breathing (which 
did improve when he was put on the respirator). Not being able to pick him up or have my 
wife breast-feed him adds to our feelings of frustration and helplessness. We've been 
told that he will have to stay in the hospital for at least 3 weeks. It didn't help 
matters when the nurse said that almost none of the other babies there (most of whom 
were less than half his size) had been forced to use the respirator. I feel a little 
guilty in wondering why my son has to do it when the others were able to breath on their 
own, although it's great to see how well the other babies are doing, which gives me hope 
everything will be ok.

My point for writing? I'm hoping that anyone who has been through this may have some 
particular advice to offer on how to cope, what we may expect and anything else that you 
might think is appropriate (i.e. WWW sites I should check out, etc.) I'd appreciate 
anything I can get right now, as I feel pretty scared and uninformed -- the 
hospital staff is excellent and helpful, but I'd like to get information from people 
who've had to go through similar experiences.

Please e-mail me at fhackett@worldlink.ca, if you have anything for me.

Many thanks,
-- 
Fred J. Hackett