new members
Gary Shuman (gshuman@ix.netcom.com)
Fri, 29 Mar 1996 10:48:47 -0800
Hello. This is our second try to get our message on-line. We joined
this week and had not heard from anyone so we thought we would try
again.
We are the parents of two preemies. Carly is now 10. She was a
25-weeker weighing 1 lb 8 oz. Dustin is 9. He was a 34 weeker weighing
4 lb 13 oz. Both are doing splendid. But we did have our bad times.
Due to complications in public schools we are home-schooling them and
plan to do so indefinitely. (Spare us your questions on socialization).
I could tell you all about the labels my kids have been given in order
to cubby-hole them. But the bottom line is they are not those labels.
The are great kids that one would never know had been thru hell and
back. They are quite normal (whatever normal is). We feel fortunate to
have them.
About the question of child abuse, when Carly was only 6 or 7 months
old, I took her to the grocery store. She was being patched at the time
for a lazy eye. She was also wearing a splint on her hand to keep her
from fisting, and one on her foot to keep her from toeing. It did look
rather peculiar, but really nobody else's business. I was approached by
a woman clear out of the blue who demanded to know what sort of
accident my baby had beem in and why was I treating her myself. Totally
speechless, I gave her a disgusted look and walked away. Later I found
out that she went to the manager's office to ask that they get someone
from the police to come over and confront me. The manager was a
personal friend of ours, so he immediately raked her over the coals,
gave her the epic saga of Carly's birth, and asked her to leave the
store. I was so humiliated.
We have been foster parents so we realize the importance of
intervention, but we also agree that calls to Services should never be
made on a hunch. If the child is CLEARLY distressed AND the parent
OBVIOUSLY abusing the child or OBSERVED abusing the child then a call
should be made. These are serious matters not to be played with. It is
always best to call a clergyman or a pediatrician if you are not sure.
We have found they know alot of info about people and sometimes may
have inroads as to why baby has a bruise or why Carly is wearing
splint.
Let us hear from you. Is anyone out there?
Stacey and Gary Shuman, parents to Carly and Dustin