Re: job stress/preterm labour

Cris Coffey (CCOFFEY@rugs.bry.indiana.edu)
Thu, 28 Mar 1996 12:10:41 EST5


Cynthia,

C'mon over to Indiana University!  I feel really bad for you that 
your boss is such a dweeb.  I was very lucky.  I work for Indiana 
University's Research and the University Graduate School, Office of 
Sponsored Research Services (and I'm currently tapping my office 
resources to see what we can do about having some studies done on our 
similar cases that have not yet been studied!).

There was a period of about 3 days between the beginning of my 
complications and my being put on strict bed rest.  Those three days, 
I did not work.  I was told to rest and return for another check in a 
couple of days (at which time I was told to stay in bed).  After 
going to the doctor that day, I stopped in at the office on my way 
home to tell my immediate supervisor about it and to "close up shop" 
and tie up loose ends.  My supervisor held me while I cried.  She had 
been through a miscarriage before and she could see how frightened I 
was of losing Brandon.

I tried my best to do part-time work at home (I was worried about 
finances) and my supervisor visited me to bring anything she thought 
I could do with little effort while in bed, because that's what I 
wanted.  She eventually ended up stopping by to pick up the job 
procedures I had written out so that someone else could fill in for 
me.  I couldn't handle even the part-time work.  My office and bosses 
were really good about all of this.  They rarely called me for office 
business--only when absolutely no one else could figure something 
out.  They DID call about once a week to see how I was doing 
personally.  They sent me a bouquet to brighten  up the bedroom.  
They waited a while, then sent me this giant get well card that got 
pinned on my bedroom wall.  After Brandon was born, my immediate 
supervisor was the first one at the hospital during visiting hours.  
In fact, she was the first non-family member to hold my son.  Two 
days after we came home from the hospital, the receptionist in my 
office came by with her husband to see Brandon and drop off some 
gifts.  My entire office pitched in and bought us a very expensive 
gift--a Travel Tender they knew I was wanting.  On top of that, she 
had another gift for me that the entire floor in my building pitched 
in for (other offices not related to mine, but my friends who would 
have given me a shower).  

They were all really good to me.  I was off work for a total of 6 
months (4 in bed, took 2 to recouperate) and no one held it against 
me.  They were terrific during my months of Hell when Brandon was 
having physical difficulties and allowed me to miss even more work 
and make it up at a later date (I ran out of vacation/sick time).

Maybe you should move to Indiana--I couldn't have asked for better 
bosses through this whole ordeal.  And the "big" boss is a 
man--should have been shovenistic, but he was actually very 
understanding and very concerned for my health and my baby's life.  I 
can't see leaving this department ever!  They're too good to me.

Cris