Bonding

*Joyce Worsley TRS 396-5440 (jworsle@epfl2.epflbalto.org)
Sat, 23 Mar 1996 11:55:34 -0500 (EST)


I pondered this question in my heart for a long time after the children 
were born. I had read so many books that talked about that "golden hour"
of bonding after the birth. I was sure that our entire future 
relationship was jeopardized because I didn't get to see them for many 
hours after they were born or hold them for several weeks. 
After they came home I mostly felt like a nurse because of the monitors, 
nonstop feedings, no sleep, etc. I mean I knew in my heart that I loved 
them but I was just so tired I didn't have time to wallow in the love or 
enjoy a lot of quiet time with them. They were both extremely colicky and 
when one was asleep, the other was awake. It probably wasn't until around 
Thanksgiving of that year (they were born in Jan.) that I realized how 
much I had come to love them both, how much they had changed my world and 
my perception of the universe. So now when I hear stories about that 
"golden hour" I just say hooey. I bonded with my babies just fine, 
although assuredly in a different way then most people with "normal" 
births do.
Peace, 
Joyce- Mama to Justice and Destiny, 25 weekers, 01/19/93