Imagine...

The *imagine* thread got its start when one preemie-l member, Diane Maroney, asked for some input for a speech she was preparing for a neonatal conference.  She wanted us to describe what it is really like to be a parent of a preemie.

The *imagines* became one of the most powerful and healing threads we have had on   preemie-l.  Another member, Becca Pittelko, was so moved by the strength in everyone's words, that she compiled all the imagines together and posted them to her website.  Please visit "Imagine, stories of preemies" at the web address: http://prairie.lakes.com/~psydd/imagine/imagine.html
Be warned, carry a box of tissue!!

Being in labor for over 8 weeks, being confined to your left side so long that the hair on your left leg has stopped growing...
The feeling you get when you hear your doctor cuss every time he looks at your sonogram....
Being warned again and again that you can not get upset and emotional over one of your son's death, because the stress causes too many contractions, and now you are fighting for the remaining twin to stay alive...
Being told by the doctor that he will not do heroic measures if there is no heartbeat, but PUSH anyway...
The deafening silence in a room filled with at least 20 people as we wait an eternity to hear "I got a heart rate!!!!!!!!!!!"...
Your very first official Mother's day starts with a phone call saying that your son had to be reintubated due to a collapsed lung...
Not being able to hold your son for over 3 weeks...
Wondering if your son really knows your touch, or simply views you as another set giant hands....
Walking through the halls with your son's isolette, on the way to hernia surgery, hearing rounds of "look at that TINY baby", and all you can think of is that he looks absolutely HUGE to you...
Bursting with pride as you show your husband the FULL 2 OZ you have FINALLY managed to pump, only to have a woman walk by with a bag containing over 8...
Having the nurses absolutely fall in love with your husband simply because he visits so often and actually begs to take part in his son's care...
Having to ask permission to change your own child's diaper...
Imagine calling your sister-in-law for advice, because while you are well versed on what to do if your son stops breathing, and turns blue, giving endless medications has become second nature, and you actually know the meaning of medical technospeak words like Bronchopulmonary Dysplasia, Intraventricular Hemorrhage, and Necrotizing Enterocolitis...
You have absolutely no idea what to do when your son falls and bangs his tooth on the desk...

Tammy - Mom To:
Taylor (28 wks, now 4),
Taylor's id twin and guardian angel - Alex,
and Travis (FT, now 2).