I'm now going to vent about one specific item in the current edition and I sincerely hope that you will not be offended by this. It is not intended as a personal attack .   However, I was horrified when a friend with a younger premature baby rang me in tears after reading the piece on 'I couldn't even carry him/her to term'. I had thought it rather inappropriate when this thread appeared on the discussion forum but didn't comment as I didn't want to be snotty when others were obviously getting something out of it. If I had realized that it would end up with an even wider audience I would certainly have said something. My friend was distressed and I am too, first of all by the whole attitude of it being somehow the mother's fault that the baby is premature. Isn't this a mindset which everybody on preemie-l works to avoid? Yet here is a piece which begins with 'It's my fault' as it's apparent basis. Then looking at the 'completions', while I'm sure they were very cathartic for the people who wrote them I think they are very inappropriate for publication to other, maybe less experienced parents of premature babies who may not have the opportunity to breastfeed at all let alone for a year, give up their jobs, stay at home all day and spoil their baby rotten. Parents of premature babies surely have enough to worry about already without being made to feel even worse by a support newsletter. I know that this item was included as 'levity' but please, please remember that if we are going to pass the Early Edition on in hardcopy form it is very often going to go, without explanation, to people who have little experience of being a prem parent and frequently little other support. I really hope that you are not upset with me for writing this, I do think that the publication is otherwise really great which I guess is why I'm so upset by this one thing. It's notoriously difficult to express any emotion via email; I hope and intend that this comes across as constructive criticism.

Respectfully,
Niki (mother to Fred, 29 weeks 14 Oct 1995)

Niki,
Thank you for your letter and comments. I must say that you have given me some food for thought. The topics included in the newsletter are pretty much my choosing. So I am the appropriate person for you to have sent this message.
I have to say that when I read, and included the thread, I had not looked at it from the viewpoint that you mentioned.  I do feel that it was originally intended to be a piece of humor, and a bit of a stress/vent reliever.
As I reflect on the matter, I can see how the thread could be considered inappropriate. My sincere apologies.  As the editor, my hope for the newsletter is to bring forth many different aspects of the preemie experience and get people talking about them.  Of course, this also means that we open ourselves up for a bit of controversy.  Showing all viewpoints is how we can heal and grow.  Thank you for your comments!