Discussed This Month
|Anne speculates, "I
have often wondered what Vincent might remember of his 8
weeks in NICU. He seemed very distressed in the first few
days and then became very withdrawn and passive. He
stayed withdrawn for most of his first year, and then
gradually became more confident about and interested in
the world. He's just turned 3 and is a very bright and
lively little boy with a normal response to pain and no
particular fears except ...
He's always had a "thing" about owls. He was fascinated the first time he saw a picture of one, and when he first learned to crawl he would head straight for the bookshelf to find "What bird is that?" and then go through it as best he could until he found the page about owls. He always seemed very tense when he was looking at owl drawings.
...For the last few months he's been having nightmares and calling out, "Owl hurting Vincent".
...I thought of the combination of bright lights, watching eyes and pain. Are these memories of NICU or am I reading too much into it?
Apart from the owl revelation, I would have said that Vincent shows no sign of remembering the horrors of NICU. What do other parents think about their children's very early memories?"
Nancy adds, "This
is one of my big concerns....what if anything do they
remember about that time??? I don't want them to remember
all the pain and not being with their family - here is
another big part of my guilt feelings. If only I could
have held them in longer they wouldn't have had to
experience all of that. I hated having to leave them
there by themselves. I know the nurses did the best they
could, but it can't possibly compare to a mothers love
and attention they shower on their children.
Andrea wonders, "... if our son remembers any of the experiences he had in the NICU. When we first got him home, he was very sensitive for at least the first couple years about having things touch his face. He hated it. I slowly conditioned him into liking it again, by gently stroking his cheeks or forehead at pleasant times, and by touching his face minimally at more negative times (when he was already upset about something). Now he loves to have his face/head/body lightly stroked, especially at bedtime...
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