Mother of us all

Passion grows in me like a flower plucked in its prime
crying out for mercy as it sees the hand descend,
grab it by the throat and decapitate it
yet it lives
put it in water and consciousness returns
watching mankind
I'll get you back just you wait
soon disappearing with its feelings of love
close to nature
knowing without mind how nature is the key to it all
we are nature
we are one with all things like the flower
but apart from certain people like the Aboriginal
we have forgot this closeness and
in losing it have lost ourselves
so we wander this world making more sugar sticks to play with
more gadgets, inventions,
things to improve the world
things we know never work and even if they do
we know how man still exists under the seemingly permanent cloud
of ignorance and depression
no matter what
man feels like this
why
because we have severed our natural links to the earth and
until we get them back we will continue these aimless searches for
answers, not finding any and going crazy in one way or the other
all this time
this truth one searches for
is underfoot
mother nature
learn from the Aboriginal about respect for the land
it is our god, our saviour and our provider
do not rape it but
tend it carefully and lovingly as it is the mother of us all.


One

Let them all go
good and bad
pleasurable
painful
all the same
illusions of an imaginary I
look directly into it
it disappears
no I
no separation
one
always


Simply be

technology
advancements
the Internet
sugar sticks to play with
man seeks love
truth
understanding
and is fed toys
look a telephone
look a computer
aren't they wonderful
occupying man for a time
until he grows bored and chucks it in the corner
moving onto the newest toy
all the time feeling a nagging hole within
seeing the emptiness of these toys
he goes on chasing more and more toys
getting nowhere
like a dog chasing its own tale
futile
see with no mind how these toys are not the answer
there is no answer
see it directly with no I, no subject
simply be
eat, shit and sleep
nothing more


Watching

Outside the night is dark and still
punctuated by the gentle tinkle tinkle of the monastery chimes
I sit watching television
bang
tv set goes off
no lights work
quiet and eerily dark
I creep outside and look over at the neighbours
dark
must be the whole street is out
street lamps are out cascading the road into black
a white rocking chair on the porch beckons
I climb onto the porch and settle down to watch the night
a group of boys are playing
torches in hand they shout to a second group
lots of running back and forth
chasing, laughing and screaming
they duck next door and hide in the garden
I watch
finally they notice me in the dark watching them
It spooks them
I can hear them whispering amongst themselves
drawing bravado from each other
shouting loud to justify there being there
I watch and say nothing
soon they ignore me and return to their game
I watch some more
I notice the lights have come back on
silently rise and retire inside
leaving the boys to their play


No 6 tram from Malvern

the road stretched before me
no turns or bumps
straight as a die
antique shops rubbed shoulders with bistros
very upmarket
every second car a jag or Mercedes Benz
a place for the rich to show off their wares
sitting on an old green rattling tram
I gazed out the windows watching the antics
unconcerned
detached
A beautifully manicured children's playground
not a piece of grass out of place
a middle aged conductor busied himself
cheerily walking up and down the tram
wearing green regulation shorts
showing off stocky little legs and shouting 'fares please' in a
singsong voice, gaily chatting to passengers
rolling through Pharan on our way to the city on
the no 6 tram from Malvern.


Ideas and Words

ideas aplenty
words scrolling across a blue lined page
forming sentences
meaning
describing, illuminating
happy and funny sentences
sad and despairing
true to life and fantasy
conjuring images in our minds
all false
all illusion
how can it not be
when our life and ego is all illusion


Lonely Breadcrumb

round, white in the middle
with a faded flowery outer rim
lonely breadcrumb hugs the border
between outer and inner
as though afraid to announce its presence
hoping no one notice it
I do and stare down


Buddha and the video phone

Buddha's head sits on my computer with eyes closed
meditating on the pentium chip inside
behind Buddha sits my modem
link to the Internet and the world
so easy to talk to friends all over the word using email
type away, click a button and its there
amazing
video phones
bollocks
mine stays off
I don't want to be forced to stare at a mini camera whilst talking to someone
seeing their rigid face peering back
no way
I want to be able to stuff my face
pick my nose
wax my ears and pull out the cling ons
whilst talking
no one to see this
lazing around
cock in hand
stroking yourself forgetfully as you talk
video phone
no way hombre, not for me


Masks on the wall

two masks smile at me as I write
suspended on our kitchen wall
one a Garuda from Indonesia
bringer of good luck I believe
the other I forget the name
from Bali
monkey god I think
blessings on us all
gaily decorated in lively bright colours
hello you two
any good stories to tell me
I hear a dry laugh
notice them wink at each other
clear their thoughts
in fact we've got some crackers for you
really I say putting down my pen
leaning back I await their stories
and boy do they have some good uns


Bottle of Beer

click off the top
take a slug


My first briefcase

my first briefcase
brown, leather with numerous slots
for credit cards, pens
you name it, there is a slot

my first briefcase
suit and tie job
no more trackies and T-shirts
trainers and stubbly chin
now its a shave every day
hair kept neat
pressed shirt and trousers
don't forget the tie
a career minded man now
no chance
still
my first briefcase
I handle it tenderly


Labour day in Melbourne

we went to mcdonalds for dinner
big mac, fillet of fish, chips for me
Sarah had a happy meal
as did Lisa her friend
trish completed the group with a box of nuggets
sweet and sour sauce and apple pie
there we sat
munching away
the place packed
this labour day
after the scoffing the playing
down slides, up ladders, through hoops
my gut felt fit to burst
as I pushed Sarah up the slide
kids rushed and screamed jostling each other
bigger kids than Sarah I watched like a hawk
Lisa played hopscotch sending Sarah into fits of laughter
copying her older friend
skipping and jumping all over the show
soon it was time to leave
we packed up the remnants of our meal
trooping contentedly back to the car
dropping Lisa off with her mum
the three of us loaded inside
trish and I to watch coronation street
Sarah to bedibobyes and sleep
where she is as I write.


Idiots drive

the idiots driving souped up cars
one smashed into a pole the other night
they never learn
too bad for them
don't give a toss if they smash and die
but what about innocent bystanders they may take with them
I can talk


Barrel of Beer

I swigged a barrel of beer
a barrel
a barrel
I swigged a barrel of beer
Boy it tasted good


Void Feelings

Stopping a summer heatwave
left in the narrows
I fell in love
clutching at straws and shadows
night and day
feelings across the void
let me go
throw off these shackles
fly free
free
to see the stars shining bright
dawn raising her golden head
free to love
free of the self to see the truth


Sunday Balti

Sunday and the balti bubbles on the stove
beef, mushrooms and salty pepper
mixed in with the sauce and bubbling
tasting
licking
parathas to come and wrap the balti in
dipping
feeding
loving
the sheep talk to the wolves and say hello
wolves cry and ask their forgiveness
all is change
all are alive
the trees and the rock
bow down before nature
bow down before yourself
not separate from nature
one with nature
as natural as a stream
behold yourself in a new light
as a tree
glowing
look but do not think
the blind man saw his soul and it weeped
weeped for the lost child of man
of all creatures
lost
alone and not knowing where to go
who to turn to
in thrall to the master mind
begging help from the tricker
who laughs and provides us with more ignorance
throw him off
no fighting
ignore him
ignore all he uses
thought is his weapon
ignore thought
ignore your mind
look at Buddha, Christ, Mohammed, Krishna, the sun, the moon, nothing
anything
it does not matter as long as you are ignoring your mind
ignore your mind and feel the joy of truth
one with all
ignore your mind and all your thoughts.


No change

what?
I don't know
I sit here empty
yet with a sinking feeling in the gut
despair
my mind haunts me
then offers itself as a solution
cunning trap
I feel weak
I need something
mind offers a welcoming warmth
come on, we'll talk and sort out the problem
I look longingly
tempted
feeling so low
but I will not succumb
for all my life I have
and for what
nothing
never works
all this 'I'll do this, that and so on'
ad infinitum
from
want for it
now
a strange sign to confirm it
a cross on my head
closing and opening my eyes in the shower
getting soaked in the rain
but it never works
I soon resort to my old self
the spiral continues
It cannot work
impossible
because I am trying to use the mind to solve the problem
the mind is the problem
nothing else
the mind
how can it be used to sort itself
it cannot
you become like a dog chasing its own tail
strengthening the illusions of mind
which hold you in ignorance
so do not be tempted
stick with the empty feeling
watch the mind
do nothing to escape the low feelings
look them in the face
with no mind
watch
give the mind no fuel
to strengthen the feeling of I
there is no I
see this with insight not the mind
seeing it is enough
there is nothing to do
we are perfectly perfect already
nothing needs changing
if only we saw it.